WWYD - What Would You Do? 7/20/17

Chester Bennington from Linkin Park took his own life this morning, weeks after his friend Chris Cornell did the same. A pair of very sad stories, they got me thinking about how you can have fame, fortune, fans, all the stuff normal people dream of, and at the end of the day, it might not make you happy.

I had about half of a blog finished talking about that exact thing, but then decided to delete it and start over. Primarily because I don't have any idea if they were happy or not. I can assume they weren't, based on how their lives ended. But I think it's possible that they were indeed content with their day to day lives, and simply had something inside of them that they couldn't overcome. I'm not even going to attempt to pretend I know enough about mental health to provide any level of credible opinion. 

At the end of the day, I didn't start this blog entry to debate why these men did what they did. The events of today just got me thinking about life, and how you don't know when it's going to end. You might (and hopefully do) have 50, 60, 70 years left on this planet. You might have a week. To spend the time you have left doing anything other than what you want to is nothing short of a tragedy. It's a lesson that has taken me years to learn, but I feel like I finally understand that. 

People spend their entire adult lives working at jobs they hate, doing things they don't want to do. This ideology, at least for many of us, is learned at a young age. You go to school, then you get a job, work until you're old, and then retire and chill out until it's over. I've never completely subscribed to that theory. My parents instilled me with a great work ethic, and I've had a job since I was 14. But I've never been super happy about it. I could tell whatever I was doing wasn't what I wanted to be doing, and while I'd find short term happiness at a new job, over time, I would get back to the same point I'd reached before. I hated getting up and going to work every morning, and I wasn't happy with the thought of someone else telling me what to do for 1/3 of my day.

Luckily, I (eventually), found comedy. I just realized as I type this that tomorrow (July 21) is the 18 month anniversary of the first time I took a mic out of a stand and tried to make people laugh. There's been ups and downs over the last year and a half, but I've taken more steps toward being happy and excited about life over that time than I think I did in the 15 years prior that I'd been out of High School. I'm doing what I want to do with my life, and I'm in a spot mentally where I finally feel like I'm at peace with myself. I don't have any interest at all in getting rich or famous, I just want to be happy day to day. And I am. 

(I'm also RIDICULOUSLY lucky to have a girlfriend that understands and supports me).

The point I'm trying to make, is that you don't have forever. If you're at a job you hate, or in a relationship that doesn't make you happy, you owe it to yourself to do something about it. And you can always do something about it. I've heard many times that a lot of people work their entire lives, and then on their death beds, have a list a mile long of regrets over things they wish they had done. Personally, I think there's anything group of people that die content. Not happy. Content. They never thought about the possibility of doing anything other than what they were told to do with their life, and auto-piloted though the entire thing. Frankly, I don't know which option scares me more.

Do what you want to do with your life. Be positive, be happy. If something has a negative effect on your life experience, see if you can cut them/it out. Kevin Smith said it best:

"The world is full of 'why?' 'Why do you want to do that? Why would you do that?' Fuck that. Surround yourself with 'why not?' 'You want to do that? Why not? Let's try it!'"

Write a book, paint a picture, learn something new, make a Youtube video. Fuck what other people think. At the end of the day, this life is yours, and nobody else's, and you owe it to yourself, and the million other sperm that didn't make it this far, to do something cool with it.

WWYD - What Would You Do?

Thanks for reading my rambling blog. New podcasts are coming in the next few days as well. Because why not?

- Adam

It's been a while! 5/8/17

I like to read a lot of blogs. Wrestlers, musicians, comedians. I think it's really cool to get a glimpse into someone's life and thought process when they're away from work, or the pubic or whatever. And it used to really bug me when someone wouldn't blog for a long period of time. "I've been too busy to sit down and hammer one of these out." How can you possibly be too busy to take 15 minutes and write a blog?

I've been too busy to take 15 minutes and write a blog.

Well, probably not. But between comedy, work, the podcast (which I've also struggled to keep up with), and selling our house (which potentially sold last week!), the blog has just fallen down the depth chart. I'm sure all 15 of you that read it have survived, and maybe even thrived, in it's absence.

It has been a busy couple months. On a personal note, Shay and I just got back from a vacation in Florida, which was awesome, outside of the sunburns we both brought home with us. My end goal is to be a full time comedian, and there were a few instances during our trip where I left guilty about taking time off from stand up to go on a trip like that. But finding a balance between transitioning into a new career at thirty-three, with maintaining a long term relationship, means splitting your attention between both sides. Life is about having fun, after all. And I don't get to see a ton of Shay during a normal week anymore, she leaves for work before I get up, and I'm usually out at a show in the evening, with her in bed before I get home. So it was really nice to get away and actually hang out together for a few days.

Speaking of me and Shay, we finally sold our house! Pending a couple things this week, we'll have until the end of June to find a new place to live. We're excited to start a new chapter, but both a little sad to be leaving these place. When we bought it 5 years ago, we thought we might never move again. Priorities change, though. I'm sure we'll be happy wherever we end up, and we'll find something that fits with our current lifestyle a little better.

As far as comedy goes, things have been going pretty good as well. I've been part of some fantastic shows, in front of some great audiences. I got offered my first opportunity to middle at the Comic Strip a couple weeks ago, working with Kathleen McGee and Josh Wolf. Unfortunately, we ran into an Oilers playoff game, so our late show had a smaller crowd, but they were still fun nevertheless. I'm legit happy for SOME of my Oiler loving friends, but the Oilers playing hockey in May for the first time in 11 years doesn't do stand up comedy any favours...

Speaking of the Comic Strip, I also took part in one of the prelim weeks of their annual "Funniest Person With a Day Job" competition a few weeks ago. I got into the semis, and have a shot at moving on to the Finals on May 16th. This is the biggest comedy competition in Edmonton, and almost every comic that has won it in the past has used it to help take the next step in their career. I'm really excited for the opportunity, it's something I've been looking forward to since I started telling jokes last January.

I've had more and more opportunity to get on the road as well, primarily with Mike Dambra. I really can't thank the guy enough for taking me under his wing and showing me the ropes. I feel like I've gotten much better at transitioning in and out of my usual material, and joking around with the crowd,  and a large part of that has been working with Mike. The guy makes it look so god damned easy! I've set my camera up to record a few of my sets lately, and while I still see a TON of stuff I need to improve, I feel like there's a pretty big gap between video I took last fall, and my sets now. That's all I'm asking of myself, is to just keep improving. Frankly, I never want to watch one of my sets and just be happy with everything. I think the moment you don't think you can get any better at this, you should quit. Why keep going to the gym, if you don't think you can get any stronger?

I also finally got some professional head shots done, so I don't have to just use cell phone pictures of me on stage for promotional material anymore. I learned that Photoshop can do a lot of things, including help a man see straight, but it can't make a stupid looking man look less stupid :)

My whole wheat side...

...and my frosted side.

All in all, life is pretty good. I have big plans for comedy over the next year, things on the business side of the industry, that I think/hope will help me get ready to try and make the leap into becoming a full time comedian. I hope to be ready to post about them on here in the upcoming months. In the mean time, I just want to stay focused on getting better on stage, and writing more jokes. I have a goal of having an hour + of material by my 2 year anniversary in January, and I'm comfortable hitting the 35 minute mark right now. I think I could push for 40, if the opportunity presented itself. I'm not 100% happy with everything I have right now, but I know it keeps improving, and that's all I can ask from myself.

Thanks for reading, and supporting me, as always. It really means a lot to me.

Adam

Sunday Rambling 11/20/16

Random Sunday night thoughts;

I've hated Sundays for most of my life. It feels like the countdown to the start of the new school/work week. I always found that after about 3 PM I couldn't enjoy the rest of the day, because I knew I had to go back to the grind in the morning. Since I started changing up how I live my life, I've found that feeling slowly starting to go away. I spent 33 years letting my brain program itself like that, it's going to take a while to reset.

I turned 33 on Thursday. I kind of wanted to go to a couple comedy shows and see if I could land a spot, as I wasn't booked anywhere, but my girlfriend convinced me to stay home. We had some friends over, ate a bunch of food, and just played video games and hung out. It turned out to be a really good time. As you get older, the amount of time you have to spend with people gets smaller. Be selective about who gets your time, but make time for the people that don't suck.

I thought 30 kind of sounded old, but 33 doesn't seem like a big deal. I don't think the numbers will really sink in until 40 now. All things considered, I think I'm pretty happy with what I've accomplished since 1983. I'm not a Ghostbuster like I originally planned, but things could be a lot worse. I have a great girlfriend, a house, good friends, and a supportive family. I could count my real problems on one hand. Life is good :)

Things are going way too well for me in Fantasy Football this year. I'm in 1st in both of my leagues, and right in the hunt of my two pick 'em pools. I expect the boom to drop any day now....

I don't spend much time watching sports anymore. I still catch Sportscentre almost every morning (NOT Sportsnet Central, seriously, how much does Sportsbet suck?), but I stay too busy to have any time to sit down and watch a full game these days. Luckily, Carey Price makes it so you don't have to watch the Habs games anymore. I'm embarrassed to admit  I was pissed when the Habs traded Halak for Eller instead of Price....

I published episode 5 of the Comedy Odyssey today. Listenership has been up and down, I'm still really trying to find my way with podcasting. I really enjoy recording them. Editing them kind of sucks. The feedback, good and bad, from those of you that listen has been very much appreciated. I don't plan on quitting anytime soon. It's really a different experience learning how to do something in front of people instead of in the privacy of a classroom or your house. I think, like stand up, it motivates you to work harder at it, so people can see you're improving. Or at least trying to, anyways.

Signed my first "contract" (?) for stand up tonight. It's just for a one off spot at a show in December, but I still thought it was pretty sweet. Every month it seems one or two cool things happen to me in the comedy world. Not knowing what's next keeps you moving forward when things go wrong. 

I've had a couple rough nights in the last month. Nothing crazy, but I've lost my focus on comedy, and had a couple moments where I caught myself asking, "why am I doing this?" I take it really seriously, and sometimes I think I let myself forget that it's supposed to be fun. I need to remember to just take a step back and look at it as an adventure. Not knowing what's around the corner is what makes it so fun. When I hit a point where it isn't fun anymore, I'll quit.

If you've ever sent me a nice message, come out to one of our comedy shows, listened to my podcast, or read this blog, thanks for supporting me. I don't know if or when this ride will end, but I'm glad you want to take it with me. I hope we end up somewhere nice.

Adam

Don't let anyone tell you what to do 11/9/16

I posted this on Facebook a few months ago. I think it still hits home:

"One of the guys I work with, probably the dude I like the most there, had his first child this week. Wednesday, his wife went into labour. And he was still working. I told him to get the hell out of there and get to the hospital, and he said we were too busy, and he'd go when he could. That's exactly what's wrong with society today.

Everyone has their own priorities. And if someone disagrees with yours, to hell with them. I think you probably spend the first 25 years of your life laying the foundation of that list, and then you tweak it as life goes on. I know for a fact that my buddie's family was a much higher priority to him than his work, but he felt obligated to stay. That's not being honest to yourself. Do what you want, what makes you happy. 

A few years ago, I wasn't doing that well. Shay and I had just bought our house, we had some money. Health. No worries. But I didn't feel right. Like I was just going through the motions, wasting time. I made a very conscious decision to start eliminating things/people that I weren't making me happy, and to start cramming as much positivity into my life as possible every day. I quit a very good paying sales job to go do something that I thought would be more fun (and it was), and I started phasing some people out of my life. I just decided I didn't want to be around them anymore. If anyone ever feels that way about me, I would hope they'd do the same. And it worked. I feel much better about life these days. I'm very happy.

I read something around that time that said "there is endless power in giving zero fucks." It's not the classiest sentiment ever, but it's spot on. I used to want everyone to like me. Now, there's a very small group of friends and family whose opinions matter to me very much, and if you're not in that circle, I don't really give a damn what you think. If I'm not hurting you, just let me do what I want. 

My current job demands a lot of hours from me, I work 55 or so in a 5 day a week, plus some weekends. I don't like it, but as of now, I've accepted the trade off, they get my time, and I'm happy with the money they give me for it. But if that job ever tries to overtake something that I feel is a higher priority (and there are a lot of them), then they'll quickly find out I won't be there anymore. It's a humble brag, but anyone that has worked with me would be quick to say that I'm a pretty hard worker (I think, anyways), and I do my best to help the team and pull my weight. But I've also switched jobs 4 times in about 12 years. Once because I felt they were trying to become to work their way to the top of my priority ladder, once because I just wasn't happy anymore, and once mostly for financial reasons. And even though the job I have now is very secure and well paying, I have no hesitation to quit, and no worry of getting fired, if it ever isn't a fit anymore. Because I just don't enjoy working. I like things that I find fun. And I wasn't out here just to let someone else tell me what to do all my life.

The moral of this ridiculously long post is that your life is a dictatorship. You call the shots. The only people that can get into your board of directors are your family, and your close friends. And that's only if you deem them worthy of a chair at the table. If someone doesn't like how you're running your business, then don't do business with them anymore. You have 24 hours a day to spend on anything you want. Don't let anyone spend even one minute of them for you."

As you probably know, I did end up walking out of that job at the beginning of October. I wasn't happy there, and my girlfriend and I decided the money wasn't worth it anymore. I wasn't sure what I was going to do, but the universe picked me up and led me to something better. I don't make the money I used to make, and I was 10 weeks away from a $4000 bonus, but I don't care. I will never, ever, do something just a paycheque again. If I don't want to do something/be somewhere, I won't do it/be there. Taking control of your life is the single most empowering feeling in the world.

I don't know what the meaning of life is. To be honest, most the time I really don't think there is a point. In the grand scheme of the universe, we're pretty insignificant. And that's fine with me. I'm going to just stand over here and do whatever the fuck I want for the rest of my days. Watch what you want to watch. Listen to the music you like. Eat whatever you want to eat. Do what you want. If you're miserable, but you're letting someone else make you feel that way, well, that's your problem.

-Adam

Thanks for the spot

Stage time isn't easy to come by. I don't know what it's like in other cities, but here in the 780 (that sounds cool, right?), there are more comics than there are spots. Most shows have waiting lists to get a spot on, and book a few comics in advance for each week. Most also offer "draw spots" the night of the show. This is literally a "pull a name out of a hat" method to fill the last couple spots on a show, and you spend many nights driving to shows, just to enter a draw and hope you get a spot. It's fine with me, and most of us, as it's a fair way to dish out stage time. And it doesn't have to be fair. People running shows put a lot of work into them, and they're 100% entitled to decide who gets to be on it. Leaving a couple spots open for anyone to have a shot at is very generous, IMO.

This would be one of my first pieces of advice for a comic that's newer to this than I am. ALWAYS, ALWAYS thank anyone that is willing to put you on stage. They've sunk a lot of work into their show, and would totally be within the rights to just let their friends be on it every week. If you're a new comic, nobody in this industry owes you a damned thing, especially stage time, and they're taking a big chance letting someone brand new get on stage in their room. They obviously want to put on as good of show as possible, and there's a better than average chance that a new comic isn't going to light the world on fire up there. I've never understood the mentality of any comic that complains about how long they have to wait between spots, or where they're scheduled on a list. Stage time is the single most valuable commodity out there for an up and coming comedian, and if you don't show any appreciation for a spot on a show, the powers that be will have no trouble finding someone else to put on that will. 

If you don't like the way people book their shows, start your own room. I assume you'll find out it's not nearly as easy as it looks.

That's really it. I was just eating lunch at work, and started thinking about this. We're very lucky in Edmonton to have as many great rooms as we do to perform in. Make sure you take a moment to thank the people responsible for them. And to any and all of you that have taken the gamble of giving me a spot on your show over the last 6 months, thank you very much. I do my absolute best not to waste them. 

Cheers!