Wednesday, 9 November 2016

Don't let anyone tell you what to do 11/9/16

I posted this on Facebook a few months ago. I think it still hits home:

"One of the guys I work with, probably the dude I like the most there, had his first child this week. Wednesday, his wife went into labour. And he was still working. I told him to get the hell out of there and get to the hospital, and he said we were too busy, and he'd go when he could. That's exactly what's wrong with society today.

Everyone has their own priorities. And if someone disagrees with yours, to hell with them. I think you probably spend the first 25 years of your life laying the foundation of that list, and then you tweak it as life goes on. I know for a fact that my buddie's family was a much higher priority to him than his work, but he felt obligated to stay. That's not being honest to yourself. Do what you want, what makes you happy. 

A few years ago, I wasn't doing that well. Shay and I had just bought our house, we had some money. Health. No worries. But I didn't feel right. Like I was just going through the motions, wasting time. I made a very conscious decision to start eliminating things/people that I weren't making me happy, and to start cramming as much positivity into my life as possible every day. I quit a very good paying sales job to go do something that I thought would be more fun (and it was), and I started phasing some people out of my life. I just decided I didn't want to be around them anymore. If anyone ever feels that way about me, I would hope they'd do the same. And it worked. I feel much better about life these days. I'm very happy.

I read something around that time that said "there is endless power in giving zero fucks." It's not the classiest sentiment ever, but it's spot on. I used to want everyone to like me. Now, there's a very small group of friends and family whose opinions matter to me very much, and if you're not in that circle, I don't really give a damn what you think. If I'm not hurting you, just let me do what I want. 

My current job demands a lot of hours from me, I work 55 or so in a 5 day a week, plus some weekends. I don't like it, but as of now, I've accepted the trade off, they get my time, and I'm happy with the money they give me for it. But if that job ever tries to overtake something that I feel is a higher priority (and there are a lot of them), then they'll quickly find out I won't be there anymore. It's a humble brag, but anyone that has worked with me would be quick to say that I'm a pretty hard worker (I think, anyways), and I do my best to help the team and pull my weight. But I've also switched jobs 4 times in about 12 years. Once because I felt they were trying to become to work their way to the top of my priority ladder, once because I just wasn't happy anymore, and once mostly for financial reasons. And even though the job I have now is very secure and well paying, I have no hesitation to quit, and no worry of getting fired, if it ever isn't a fit anymore. Because I just don't enjoy working. I like things that I find fun. And I wasn't out here just to let someone else tell me what to do all my life.

The moral of this ridiculously long post is that your life is a dictatorship. You call the shots. The only people that can get into your board of directors are your family, and your close friends. And that's only if you deem them worthy of a chair at the table. If someone doesn't like how you're running your business, then don't do business with them anymore. You have 24 hours a day to spend on anything you want. Don't let anyone spend even one minute of them for you."

As you probably know, I did end up walking out of that job at the beginning of October. I wasn't happy there, and my girlfriend and I decided the money wasn't worth it anymore. I wasn't sure what I was going to do, but the universe picked me up and led me to something better. I don't make the money I used to make, and I was 10 weeks away from a $4000 bonus, but I don't care. I will never, ever, do something just a paycheque again. If I don't want to do something/be somewhere, I won't do it/be there. Taking control of your life is the single most empowering feeling in the world.

I don't know what the meaning of life is. To be honest, most the time I really don't think there is a point. In the grand scheme of the universe, we're pretty insignificant. And that's fine with me. I'm going to just stand over here and do whatever the fuck I want for the rest of my days. Watch what you want to watch. Listen to the music you like. Eat whatever you want to eat. Do what you want. If you're miserable, but you're letting someone else make you feel that way, well, that's your problem.

-Adam

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